Shampoo is Optional

Credit: Richard Jolley/Cartoonstock

I recently stopped washing my hair and, before you ask — no, it was not to deter pop-ins or dinner invitations. If I thought a dirty scalp might exempt me from social engagements, I would have done it years ago. Unfortunately, unwashed hair is not a sufficient excuse for an adult to miss a dinner party. Nor does it seem to matter if you are going into the office. I'm quite sure most of my colleagues only reach baseline office hair standards because they apply half a bottle of dry shampoo to their bouffant before leaving home every morning. 

To be clear, I didn't cease shampoo use with the expectation that I would live the rest of my life looking like I'd just dunked my head into a cold fryer vat. According to the internet, transitioning off shampoo takes most people about four to eight weeks during which time you may feel like your hair is trying to compete with the Gulf of Mexico oil spill for the title of greasiest natural disaster. Stick with it. Eventually your hair will start to emerge into a state of self-cleaning hair follicle nirvana. You will then be free. Your hair will return to its natural, healthy state and you will never need to buy another bottle of shampoo again.  

Sounds wonderful, doesn't it? Probably not. Most people will have read to this point and thought, ‘Oh no, how ghastly. I love buying shampoo and conditioner.’ That's understandable. These products generally come in lovely fragrant bottles and make your hair feel squeaky clean.

‘If I stop buying them,’ you think, ‘my hair might lose its glow and, oh my, what on earth would I put on the shower rack?’ In response to both of these concerns - you'll be fine. For starters, you'll now have room on the rack for all of the other half empty bodywash and face exfoliating bottles currently on the floor of the shower. More importantly, your hair will look a whole lot better.  

Most of us have been using these products so long that we think chemically stripped and polished hair is normal. It's not. Don't you think it's odd that we are the only animal species that requires the regular application of chemicals in order to avoid appearing like someone upended a cup of lard on our heads?  

Our hair gets used to the application of shampoo and adjusts itself accordingly. If you use the products a lot, your scalp will generate more oil to compensate for all the cleaning. Stop using them completely and the oil output decreases. Your hair will start to naturally keep itself at its correct levels. That is, it will be clean. It just won't be exactly the same as shampooed hair.  

Since I stopped washing my hair at the end of 2022, the texture of my hair has changed. I can always feel a little natural oil when I run my fingers through it. It doesn't feel dirty. It certainly doesn't look dirty. It actually looks a lot thicker, brighter, shinier and healthier than it used to. I used to put wax in it every day to get it to stay in the right place and calm the frizz - now I don't need to. I don't need to put any products in it at all. I just give my scalp and hair a vigorous scrub with my fingers in the shower every morning, towel dry it, smooth it into place and get on with my day.

So, other than to figure out what your hair would look like after a season on Survivor, why bother going shampoo-free?

Simple. Everything you buy has an environmental impact so, if you don't really need a product - or don't need to use it as often as you currently do – you should aim to stop buying it (or buy less of it, at least).  

Even if you are buying the vegan, cruelty-free, natural brands, they still have an environmental impact. They are certainly better. Knowing that your haircare product has not been rubbed into bunny rabbits' eyeballs before arriving on the shelves is always better, but they still contain a lot of chemicals. Other than the odd lavender or papaya reference, their "nothing artificial" ingredient list might as well have been written in Japanese. Buying those brands still requires the production and shipping of plastic bottles and results in chemicals washing into the water system. 

If you are not even using a cruelty-free and more natural brand, that should be the first step on your shampoo and conditioner environmental impact reduction plan. Then work on just shampooing less. Your hair will adjust from a daily wash to a three-day wash to a weekly wash. If you do it gradually over a couple of months, you’ll hardly notice the transition process and, if you are washing your hair two to six times less each week, you will still be spending less on products, have more time in the morning, and have a positive impact on the environment. Your hair will also appreciate being left alone for longer.  

On the other hand, if you prefer the idea of just ripping off the band-aid and throwing your (emptied) bottles into the recycle bin, let's get back to that 4–8-week transition.  

It really not so bad. It definitely won't be any worse than the last time you opted to snooze your alarm through the allocated hair washing time every day for a week. Dry shampoo might have been the saviour then, but once you've transitioned, you'll never need to buy those bottles either.  More importantly, you can snooze your alarm guilt-free every morning for the rest of your life — although setting your alarm for ten minutes later would probably be more sensible. 

It took my hair about a month and I honestly doubt anyone noticed. It really wasn't too bad. For starters I have very short hair that's styled the same every day. A little extra oil just meant I didn't need to use wax to get my hair to stay where it was supposed to. Women with longer hair who are considering transitioning off shampoo shouldn't feel disadvantaged as they have headband, bun and sleek ponytail options. Men with shorter hair don't have any of these oily hair disguises. Their sole saving grace is the fact that their hair is so naturally inferior to women's that there is almost no chance anyone is going to notice if it’s a little worse than normal.  

If a man is considering transitioning to a shampoo-free lifestyle, it suggests he still has hair. The fact that he is able to bear witness to his hair's chaotic journey to self-enlightenment should fill him with deep and abundant gratitude. Even an unkempt, odorous, greasy mop will be envied by his balding counterparts.  

Most likely nobody will notice and, if they do, they are even less likely to mention it. If Australians can be relied on for one thing, it is that they will go to great lengths to pretend not to notice an appearance faux pas, lest it result in an awkward conversation. If anyone does make a comment it will be your partner, that annoying guy in the office who still hasn't figured out the mute button on Zoom, or one of your children.  

All of those people can be promptly ignored (although don't tell your spouse I said that). Children, in particular, have absolutely no right to an opinion on the matter. If it wasn't for mini-emitters, nits would have been eradicated a long time ago. *  

At the very least you should give it a go. It involves doing less than what you are doing now, so nobody can say they can't be bothered, and if all goes well you'll no longer have to buy shampoo and conditioner which means you'll have less potential luggage-destroying items to pack when you travel, it will take you less time to get ready in the morning (i.e. more sleeping time), and you'll head out into the world each day sporting a brilliant bouffant. 

What could be better than that?

 The Quiet Environmentalist

Further Reading:

The 'No Poo' Method (nopoomethod.com)

The no-poo movement: Could you do without shampoo? - ABC News

No Poo: What Is It and Does It Work? (healthline.com)

No Poo Guide – Natural methods of cleaning your hair. No Poo Movement.

* I am aware of the ‘fact’ that nits prefer children with clean hair. That was something we all learned in primary school. However, there doesn't appear to be any scientific evidence of it. It was most likely just a rumour spread by the red-faced mothers of the lice-infested children. Nits are happy to start a colonial outpost on just about any child's head so converting to a shampoo-free lifestyle is not going to assist with the eradication of a pest species. If you want to do that, you are better off having fewer children and taping shower caps onto the ones already in existence.

Published 07 Jan 2024